Leadership Lessons

Parshas Matos

Posted on August 1, 2019 (5779) By Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetzky | Series: Drasha| Level: Beginner

Parshas Matos begins with the laws of vows. The Torah tells us, “Moses spoke to the heads of the tribes of the children of Israel, saying, ‘This is the thing that Hashem has commanded. If a man makes a vow to or makes an oath to prohibit himself, he shall not violate his word…” The Torah then discusses how a person must honor his word, or properly nullify his vow.

 

Interestingly, Moshe did not teach these laws himself to the Jewish people, but he told the rashei hamatos, the heads of the tribes, to teach them. Why is that?

 

After Rav Yaakov Kamenetzky, zt”l, escaped Europe and took a temporary position in Seattle, he became a Rav in Toronto. The congregants, mostly of Polish descent, had some customs which differed from Rav Yaakov’s Lithuanian heritage. They would slightly hint to him that they would appreciate if he would adopt some of their customs. Once, after noticing that he did not wear a gartel (traditional belt worn by Chasidic Jews during prayers), they left one on his seat!

 

When he was asked as to why he did not wear Rabbeinu Tam Tefillin as was the minhag of chassidim, he answered that it was not the custom of Lithuanian Rabbanim.

 

“But the Chofetz Chaim wore Rabbeinu Tam!” they countered.

“The Chofetz Chaim only put on Rabbeinu Tam later in life when he was 90 years old,” replied Rav Yaakov.

 

Indeed when Rav Yaakov turned 90, he suddenly began to wear Rabbeinu Tam.

 

According to reliable sources, it was not because that was the age that the Chofetz Chaim wore them, rather, because he had implied that when talking to his Toronto baalei batim.

 

My grandfather, Rav Binyamin Kamenetzky zt”l, explained as follows. Moshe is teaching the leaders an important principle. A person’s word is gold. He must honor it and keep his resolution, come what may. But who is able to teach this by example? Only a leader who practices this in real life.

 

A leader must keep his word. Moshe told the leaders of the tribes, that they must set an example to their constituents. The only way to teach integrity is by practicing it. A leader must do more than just lead. He must be able to practice what he preaches. Only then, can he genuinely impart these lessons to his disciples.

 

 

The Stuff of Real Life

Parshas Masei

Posted on July 6, 2021 (5781) By Rabbi Naftali Reich | Series: Legacy | Level: Beginner

This week’s Torah portion concludes with an overview of the Jewish nation’s wanderings in the wilderness, as well as key laws and preparations associated with their inheriting the land. Moshe Rabbeinu designated six Levite cities, three in Eretz Yisrael and three in Trans-Jordan, as cities of refuge where an accidental murderer can escape an avenger from the victim’s family.

 

Although his act of homicide was not premeditated, the Torah considers him culpable for being negligent, and not adequately protecting another’s life. The time he spends in the Ir Miklat will enable him to realign his values and correct the habits that led to his negligent behavior. The Levite city was the ideal place to achieve this rehabilitation. The Levites were landless and wholly devoted to teaching and guiding their fellow Jews. Even while in Egypt, the Levites were preoccupied with spiritual advancement, and distanced themselves from the pursuit of material prosperity.

 

Their conduct was emblematic of the highest degree of moral responsibility. Living among people of this caliber would re-educate and sensitize the murderer to the supreme sanctity of human life.

 

The Talmud asks why were there precisely the exact number of “refuge” cities in Trans Jordan as there were in Israel? After all, Trans Jordan was only home to two and a half tribes, while the remaining nine lived in Israel. Why not distribute the cities of refuge in a way that would more accurately reflect the demographics?

 

The Talmud answers that in Trans Jordan there were more homicides and the population’s sensitivity to human life became diminished. The likelihood of accidental murder was therefore greater. The average citizen was less conscious of the need to exert himself to the utmost to protect his fellow Jew; he would be more likely to pursue his own needs at the expense of his fellow citizen.

 

The great sage R’ Itzel of Volozhin offers a different interpretation of the Talmud’s assertion that bloodshed was more prevalent in Trans-Jordan, thus requiring more cities of refuge in that region. The problem, he explains, lay not in the higher incidences of accidental homicide in Trans-Jordan but in the over-eagerness to avenge it. Since the inhabitants of Ever HaYarden were less sensitive to murder, it was far more likely that an accidental killer would be pursued by a family member driven to exact vengeance for unsavory reasons. The Torah therefore provided the perpetrator with more immediate access to an Ir Miklat.

 

The culture of tolerance toward bloodshed would delude people into thinking they were motivated by moral principles in trying to avenge their relative’s death, when all too often they were simply trying to even the score with a hapless fellow Jew.

The underlying message of the portion is that nothing affects our mindset and value system more than our social environment. We are all conditioned by repeated and constant exposure to the prevailing culture. Harmful outside influences can easily pollute our ability to distinguish right from wrong and can easily desensitize us from appreciating the value and sanctity of every humans life.

 

This underscores the importance of ensuring that our homes are bastions of light, joy and an appreciation for the kedusha of Klal Yisroel. These values must permeate the atmosphere to the point where they are imprinted on the minds and hearts of our children. Only by building our homes according to the Torah’s blueprint can we turn them into lighthouses of positive energy. They will thus become the miniature ‘cities of refuge’ that will protect ourselves and our families from the steady onslaught of moral decay and corruption in the surrounding culture.

 

Wishing you a wonderful Shabbos

Before reading the entries below I thought it would be helpful to provide a summary of the actions of Pinchas in the Torah 

Pinchas, the grandson of Aaron the High Priest, boldly took action during a moment of moral and communal crisis in the Book of Numbers. When a leader from the tribe of Simeon publicly engaged in an illicit relationship with a Midianite woman, defying God's commandments, Pinchas impaled both of them in a single act of zealotry. His swift and courageous response halted a deadly plague that had struck the Israelites, earning him God's covenant of peace and priesthood. Far from impulsive violence, his act was framed in the Torah as a defense of divine honor and communal integrity—a moment that linked him not only to his ancestors but also to future generations through spiritual legacy and moral example.

Tying Generations Together

Parshas Pinchas

Posted on July 13, 2011 (5771) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

The Torah records for us the genealogy of Pinchas, the true and justified zealot of Jewish history. There are many reasons advanced as to why the Torah felt impelled to tell us of the names of his father and grandfather. Many commentators saw in this an explanation to justify Pinchas’ behavior while others emphasized that it was an explanation for Pinchas’ reward and G-d granting him the blessing of peace.

 

But aside from these insights there is another more general message that the Torah is recording for us. And that is that a person’s behavior affects all of one’s family members, even those of previous generations who may no longer be currently numbered among the living.

 

A great act of sanctification of G-d’s name such as the one performed by Pinchas enhances the reputations and stature of previous generations as well My rebbe in the yeshiva summed this lesson up in his usual concise and pithy manner: “If both your grandparents and your grandchildren are proud of you and your achievements then you are probably alright in Heaven’s judgment as well.”

 

Our idea of immortality is based upon generations of our families, both previous generations and later ones. We find vindication of our lives and efforts in the accomplishments of those that come after us and continue our values and faith. We cannot control what children and grandchildren will do, whom they will marry and what type of life they will lead. But innately, we feel that we have a connection to the development of their lives and the actions that they will take.

 

The Torah emphasizes for us that Pinchas’ zealotry did not come to him in a vacuum. The Torah allows everyone freedom of will and behavior. Neither good behavior nor evil behavior is ever predestined. Yet as medicine has shown us, in the physical world there is an element of physical predestination in our DNA. And this DNA affects our moral behavior as well.

 

Judaism always envisioned itself not only as a universal faith but as a particular family as well. In our daily prayer service we constantly recall who our founding ancestors were. We name our children in memory of those who have preceded us. We extol a sense of family and a loyalty to the values that our families represent.

 

One of the most destructive trends in modern society has been the erosion of the sense of family in the world. Abandoning family certainly contributes to loss of Jewish feelings and identity. It is ironic that in a time such as now when most children can be privileged to know grandparents and even great grandparents the relationship between generations in many Jewish families is frayed and weak.

 

Pinchas comes therefore to reinforce this concept of tying generations – past, present and future – together. It is imperative for us to know Pinchas’ genealogy for otherwise we have no clue as to who Pinchas was and why he behaved as he did in those given circumstances.

 

Shabat shalom,
Rabbi Berel Wein

 It Takes a Family…

Parshas Pinchas

Posted on July 14, 2017 (5777) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah| Level: Beginner

These were the numbers of the Levites according to their families: the family of the Gershonites from Gershon, the family of the Kohathites from Kohath, the family of the Merarites from Merari. These were the families of Levi: the family of the Libnites, the family of the Hebronites, the family of the Mahlites, the family of the Mushites, the family of the Korahites and Kehat begot Amram. (Bamidbar 26:57-58)

 

I think I detect a theme. In these two verses the word or some derivative of this word is used 10 times, “MISHPACHA”- “family”. The Nation of Israel is built almost entirely on this single organizational principle, family. Therefore, it might prove worthwhile to gain an appreciation of the meaning of that one Hebrew word, “MISHPACHA”.

 

The word MISHPACHA is related to the word SHIFCHA which oddly means a maidservant. How does that help define a family?

 

A senior colleague told me that that when he was a young man pursuing his doctorate in philosophy a professor made the bold declaration; “The Jewish Bible is the source of human rights in the world!”

 

All of the students diligently wrote it down in their notebooks but this curious fellow who was the only Jew in the class, promptly approached the teacher and challenged him, “Where is it written in the Jewish Bible any verse that promises human rights?”

 

The professor wondered if he in fact agreed with his claim that the Jewish Bible is the source of human rights in the world. The student agreed wholeheartedly. He was merely curious as to what the source might be.

 

This was a case of the student giving the teacher a homework assignment. A week later he came back to class and admitted that he could not find a single verse that supported his statement. He was mystified. Everybody in the history department agreed. The literature department, and the sociology department agreed too. So he fed the question back to his student, “Maybe you have the answer!”

 

This budding young scholar answered as follows: “Let’s take for example one verse, that great-general principle in the Torah “And you should love your neighbor as your-self!” The implication of that statement is that everyone has a right to be loved. When I walk into a room, since you are all obligated to love me, I have a right to be loved! The only difference is that the Torah never came as a “bill of rights” but rather as a “bill of responsibilities””.

 

Imagine how much more love exists in a relationship when both parties know what they owe in love as opposed to when each demands that their rights be met. How much more love is in the room when every member of a family knows that they are duty bound to love and happily contribute. How much greater is an entire community or a nation when it is composed of individuals who live up to this universal notion and categorical imperative to “love your neighbor as your-self”!

 

A family is a place where people learn to serve each other. On any given Erev Shabbos someone is sweeping and someone else is polishing shoes, while another person is peeling potatoes. Everyone contributes! A family is a microcosm of a whole world and is its most fundamental building block. How so? It is the training ground that prepares people for life in the greater community. Each home has its own signature style, and cultural flavor, but this quality of serving others is an immutable standard.

 

How important is a family? When my wife and I were just beginning to look for a match for our oldest son, we decided to call my Rebbe for guidelines. He is a huge Talmud scholar and he had already married off 13 children. We were ready for a long list. He answered the phone and we explained the reason for our call. He said without hesitation and emphatically, “Look for a family! A girl comes from a family!” I asked, “Is there anything else?” He said, “No! That’s it! Good night!” We were stunned. Some have said “it takes a village to raise a child” but I think we can declare with certainty and appreciate the simple fact it takes a family…

 

 

Balak’s Blind Hatred

Parshas Balak

Posted on June 23, 2021 (5781) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

The Talmud incisively comments that it is not the mouse that is a thief, but, rather, it is the hole in the wall that allows the mouse entry into the house that is the culprit. There is no question that the villain in this week’s Torah reading is Bilaam. His hatred of the Jewish people is long-standing. He was one of the advisors to the Pharaoh of Egypt who encouraged that tyrant to enslave the people of Israel. Even though it is obvious, even for him, that the will of heaven is that he should not accept the invitation of Balak to embark of the mission of cursing the Jewish people, he forces the issue, and accepts the mission willingly and enthusiastically.

 

Even a talking donkey cannot sway him from pursuing his evil path and destination. Yet, it is Balak who initiates the entire scenario. He is, so to speak, the hole that allows the thieving mouse Bilaam to enter a situation that will enable him to curse the Jewish people. Balak is the king of Moav and was guaranteed by heavenly decree that his land would not be invaded or annexed by the people of Israel, as his ancestors were descended from Lot, the nephew of Abraham.

 

Because Lot kept faith with Abraham when they were in Egypt and did not inform against Abraham and Sarah, he was afforded almost continual protection and a guarantee that his descendants would not be harmed by the descendants of Abraham. According to the Midrash, even though Balak is aware of all of this, he is still determined to destroy the Jewish people by whatever means are required. And the curses of Bilaam are one part of the plan.

 

We are taught that hatred is unreasoning, illogical, destructive, and devoid of any rational behavior. All human history shows us the truth of this Talmudic observation. Hatred leads not only to the destruction of those hated but is equally destructive to the hater as well.

 

Even after the failure of the mission of Bilaam and the clear realization that the Lord is protecting the Jewish people, Balak searches for other means to annihilate the Jews. He makes a covenant with ostensibly the mightiest king in that area and of that time, Sichon, the head of the tribe of the Emorites. And Sichon will dutifully set out to attack and destroy the Jewish people. He is defeated by the Jewish nation, and because Balak and Moav entrusted their sovereignty and independence to Sichon, with his defeat, the lands of Moav also fall under Jewish sovereignty.

 

This is illustrative of the power of hatred. People will surrender their own rights and property in the mistaken belief that their hatred will somehow translate into the annihilation of their enemy. The whole exercise of the hatred by Balak of the Jewish people transforms itself into his own defeat and demise. Hatred blinds the eyes of even the most previously wise and powerful.

Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Berel Wein

 

The First Cup of Coffee

Parshas Balak

Posted on June 28, 2018 (5778) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah| Level: Beginner

How can I curse whom G-d has not cursed, and how can I invoke wrath if HASHEM has not been angered? For from their beginning, I see them as mountain peaks, and I behold them as hills; it is a nation that will dwell alone and will not be reckoned among the nations. Who counted the dust of Yaakov or the number of a fourth of [or, of the seed of] Israel? May my soul die the death of the upright and let my end be like his.” (Bamidbar 23:8-10)

 

Bilaam is quite the enigmatic character! He’s brilliant! His vision of the Jewish People and their role in history is superior. Even though he is hired to curse the Nation of Israel he ends up delivering the most glowing report of all time. Seemingly, he gets it and even more than most.

 

Yet, he remains the same. Why does he not run to join the Jewish Nation? He expresses his desire to have his death be like that of the most righteous and the wish that his ultimate end be like theirs. He wants to die peacefully in this world and be welcomed into the next and then be revived for the curtain call of history. He says he wants it but he does nothing about it. How very strange!

 

Bilaam is like that fellow who sees a sign in front of a diner that reads, “Second cup of coffee free”. When he enters, he right away orders for the second cup of coffee. The waiter needs to remind him, “In order to get the second cup of coffee for free you have to have the first cup first.” Similarly, I have heard people jokingly express, “If I would have known how wonderful being a grandparent is I would have skipped being a parent and gone right to being a grandparent!” Of course, it’s not possible! You have to be a parent first. That’s apparent. If you want the next world you need to work here.

 

Now these are jokes, and admittedly not very good jokes and they don’t need any explanation.

 

Bilaam, however, was a prophet! He needs an explanation!

 

He was brilliant in many ways. His longing to die the death of the upright and have his end like theirs is absurd. His deeds do not match theirs. How can he seriously request their ultimate end result? It’s no joke! It’s tragic!

 

There was a Jewish patient, a Mr. Silverspoon, in an insane asylum way out in a small town in Nebraska. He insisted on being served Kosher food. When his request was denied he went on a hunger strike. The administration including doctors and a legal team realized that they would have to honor his demand.

 

So every day food had to be sent in from Chicago. It was an administrative nightmare. One day one of the psychiatrists was making his rounds on Shabbos when he noticed this fellow smoking a giant cigar. The doctor was stunned. He berated the patient, “Silverspoon, you turned the entire hospital on its head so you can get your Kosher food and here it the Holy Shabbos, and here you are smoking a cigar!?” Silverspoon gave another giant puff on his cigar before answering, “Hey Doc, don’t forget, I’m crazy!”

 

As one of my teachers pithily put it, “the Torah appreciates that that we are not logical creatures as much as we are psychological beings!” Why should we be surprised to find out that someone, anyone does not live up to what they know is right clearly in the soberest of moments!?

 

Napoleon famously declared, “When I am awake I am Napoleon. When I am asleep I am a horse!”

 

People are not one thing. Many of us are not quite entirely asleep or completely awake but more like King Solomon said, “I am asleep but my heart is awake!” Bilaam however was too connected to his horse- donkey.

 

All this is neither an apology nor an excuse for Bilaam or anybody else. Just the opposite is true. When we are awake-awake it is wise to remember what our ultimate purpose is and to stay focused on the first cup of coffee.

 

 Everyday Miracles

One who contemplates the delicacy and magnificence of an orchid or the human eye appreciates that “nature” is simply the miracles to which we are accustomed due to our constant exposure. This familiarity serves to cloud our perception of the Divine in nature, such that we accept the tangible as being no more complex than its appearance indicates. Spiritual forces and consequences are easily missed and ignored. The departure from nature, that which people call “a miracle”, is the suspension of the order of nature to allow one to comprehend G-d’s role in the world and appreciate the reality of spiritual forces at play around us. One who ponders this concept realizes that those spiritual forces of miracles are no less present even when nature proceeds as one expects. Thus, the world “nais” is used to describe the staff upon which the fiery snake was affixed.

 

G-d has His plan for Creation, and our actions do not determine the outcome of events. Indeed, our responsibility during our time in this world is not to accomplish, but to make the right decisions – G-d conscious decisions – in our effort to succeed. But that does not mean our choices are meaningless. Our decision to either foster a relationship with the Divine or allow the strength of that bond to weaken and crack impacts the spiritual realm in concrete, by humanly indiscernible, ways. Our Jewish lives are filled with icons – a Torah scroll, tzitzis strings, a mezuzah on the doorpost – to assist us in keeping our focus, to remind us of the spiritual forces and consequences, to serve as the “nais” (sign) that refreshes our appreciation of life’s daily miracles.

Anger - Avoid it at all Costs!

Parshas Chukas

Posted on June 26, 2014 (5774) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

Moshe is finally done in by the requests of the Jewish people in the desert – this time again for their water supply. In his exasperation about their constant litany of complaints and grumblings, he transgresses over G-d’s commandment to speak to the rock and instead he strikes the rock with his staff. His punishment for this act is swift and dramatic. He will not step into the Land of Israel but only be able to glimpse it from afar.

 

There are many questions and difficulties raised regarding the narrative of this incident in the Torah. Firstly, complaints about the lack of water are certainly legitimate complaints. Human beings cannot survive without water and now that the miraculous well of Miriam disappeared with her passing, the pressing need for a replacement water supply was obvious.

 

So, why does Moshe become so angry with them and describe them as a rebellious mob? And another perhaps greater and more difficult question is why this sin is the one that seals Moshe’s fate? Does the punishment really seem to be commensurate with the crime? All of the commentators to Torah over the ages have dealt with these two questions and have advanced a wide variety of insights and explanations regarding the issues raised. It is apparent that the Torah somehow wished these issues to be further explored and studied and therefore it left its own description of the matter somewhat vague and mysterious – hiding in the narrative more than it was willing to reveal.

 

Maimonides and other scholars throughout the ages see the events of this week’s parsha as the concluding part of a continuing and cumulative pattern of behavior, both on the part of the people of Israel in the desert and of Moshe as well. Moshe realizes, as do the people, that they require water to sustain them. But this request and the manner that it is presented to Moshe is part of their long- running, nagging behavior pattern in the desert.

 

For the Jewish people, there is still a vestige of resentment against G-d for redeeming them from Egypt. There they had water in abundance, and it was natural not miraculous water.

 

Miraculous water binds them to a commitment to G-d and His Torah – a commitment that a portion of the people is always attempting to wriggle out from.

 

With their seemingly reasonable request for water, Moshe senses all of this background music.

 

They really want to opt out of the entire mission of Sinai, which results in Moshe’s extreme display of displeasure. And Moshe’s anger again undoes him. There is an entire literature of rabbinic study about the moments and causes of Moshe’s anger that appear throughout the Torah.

 

For Moshe, the greatest of all human beings, it is agreed that this is his one failing. And, therefore, Moshe unwittingly becomes the model and example of the dangers involved in falling into the pit of emotional anger. The incidents of his anger – past and present – were now cumulatively judged by Heaven and the punishment is not for this one incident alone.

 

Anger is a character trait to be avoided at almost all cost.

 

Shabat shalom

Rabbi Berel Wein