Backed Up by Action

Parshas Vayakhel

Posted on March 1, 2019 (5779) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah | Level: Beginner

 

And Moshe called the whole community of the Children of Israel to assemble, and he said to them: “These are the things that HASHEM commanded to make. (Shemos 35:1)

 

And he made the dividing curtain of blue, purple, and crimson wool, and twisted fine linen; the work of a master weaver he made it, in a [woven] cherubim design. And he made for it four pillars of acacia wood, and he overlaid them with gold, their hooks [were] gold, and he cast for them four silver sockets. And he made a screen for the entrance of the tent, of blue, purple, and crimson wool, and twisted fine linen the work of an embroiderer, and its five pillars and their hooks, and he overlaid their tops and their bands with gold, and their five sockets were copper. (Shemos 36:35-38)

 

Too many times to mention the term “he made” and “they made” crowns the beginning of a verse. There is something great about this doing, this making of the Mishkan with precision. What is it?

 

The Talmud Brochos queries, “Which is more important, learning or doing?” The answer offered is: “Learning, because it leads to doing!” It seems the question is answered and not. Doing seems to be the more important value. The Mishne affirms, “The main thing is not the discussion but the action!” (Pirke Avos 1:17) If Talmud Torah is so great that it is equivalent to all the Mitzvos then how can “doing” be considered greater?

 

An elderly father called out with his weakened voice to his three boys who were in another room, “Can someone please fetch me a glass of water!?” Right away a big discussion erupted.

 

The older son seemed ready to jump into action but his two younger brothers challenged him.

 

“Why should you have the honor to get Abba a glass of water?” He responded emphatically, “Because I am the oldest!”

 

The other two insisted that they find a more fair way of deciding. In the meantime the father called out again for a glass of water. The youngest proposed that that they have auction as they would in Shul for a great honor or an Aliya.

The bidding began immediately for the high honor of getting Abba a glass of water. The numbers climbed quickly and finally the middle son won. He opined, “If I would earn such an honor like Maftir Yona, I would not keep it for myself. I would share the honor and give it to one who is truly deserving of the honor. I would give it to our dear Abba. Abba, get yourself a glass of water!”

 

The story is so absurd on many levels, I know, but it also illustrates that all the talk in the world does not substitute for action. Especially in the case of the building of the Mishkan which was the way to fix the horrific event of the Golden Calf. There is a phrase I saw from Steven Covey that rings so true, “You can’t talk your way out of a problem you acted your way into!” The solution requires action because action demonstrates sincerity.

 

I was witness to a scene where a father was called into the tuition office because his first five tuition checks bounced. Half the year passed and he had effectively not paid any tuition. He bowed his head and apologized. I felt bad for him. The comptroller asked what his plan was. So, he took out his check book. It was comical and tragic. After four bounced checks a fifth didn’t seem more promising.

 

Actions are like money in the bank and words are comparable to checks. There was an old show tune with words that went like this, “Don’t talk of love show me!” A man can say to his wife all day and with passion, “I love you!”, but his words will ring hollow if they are not backed up by action, if the garbage is not taken out, the carpool is dodged, the homework with the kids is not done, and other requests are denied. It’s like writing a big check with little money in the bank. It bounces. Words are only as valuable as there is money in the bank.

 

The sin of the Golden Calf was a major break in trust. Trust must be built slowly and with action.

 

It cannot be demanded or expected with urgency. The greatest proof that the repentance of the Children of Israel about the Golden Calf was sincere was in their doing.

 

Sure, words can work but only when backed up by action.

 

 

How Could This Happen?

Parshas Ki Sisa

Posted on February 20, 2008 (5768) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

 

After all of the commentaries and explanations regarding the event of the Golden Calf that is the centerpiece of this weeks’ parsha, one is still left, somehow, with an empty feeling of not understanding how such an event could have in fact occurred.

 

After all, did not the splitting of the sea, the war against Amalek, the manna and the miraculous wells of water, the revelation at Sinai, make an impression upon them? No doubt that all of the answers and explanations have validity, but how do we deal with this story? What is the relevance of this story to us, a generation that has many Golden Calves but certainly not that Golden calf of the parsha?

 

I think that the most direct and simple answer to this is to view the event in its simple reality. It is enough to know that such an event, though not understandable or rational, can and does occur. It should teach us about the irrationality of people, nations and political leaders. It should put us on notice that nothing in human affairs is unlikely or impossible.

 

The possibility of a Golden calf incident is always with us. By discounting the whims of human nature we expose ourselves to such sad incidents as described in this week’s parsha. Moshe never imagines that such an event can occur amongst the people of Israel and so he ascends the mountain for his own spiritual development and to bring the Torah down to the Jewish people. Aharon also never thinks that a Golden calf can spring forth from his attempts to placate the frenzied mob that now surrounds him. But, no matter, the Golden Calf arrives, alive and snorting fire. And that is life’s lesson – that the unexpected and impossible is itself always present in our lives and society.

 

Anyone who reviews the events of the twentieth century will stand amazed at the events, wars, changes and profound diplomatic and political errors that shaped its story. Nothing that happened was rational or predictable in 1901.

 

Who could have thought that the great empires of Germany, Russia, France, England, Austria and the Ottomans would never survive that century? And who could have imagined the State of Israel arising and the destruction of European Jewry? That disaster of the Holocaust is a Golden Calf of unbelievably major proportions.

 

All rumors later circulated to the contrary not withstanding, no one really envisioned such a catastrophe of so great a proportion. Since prophecy is no longer present amongst us, the future is always murky and undecipherable. Therefore, the only thing certain in our lives, both personal and national, is uncertainty.

And that is the basic and troubling message of the Golden Calf incident. The parsha is here to warn us of trusting only in our judgments, conclusions and foresight. That is not how life really works and not how events play themselves out.

 

The events of the Golden Calf constantly repeat themselves in our life story. Fortunate are those who are not seduced by that idol and are wary initially of the attempts to construct and deify it.

 

Shabat shalom.

Rabbi Berel Wein

 

 

Our Story is History

Parshas Tetzaveh

Purim

Posted on February 22, 2013 (5773) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah| Level: Beginner

And the remaining Yehudim (Jews) that were in the province of the king they congregated and stood up for their life… (Megilas Esther 9:16)

 

What was the secret of the miraculous turnabout for the Jews in the Purim story? The answer is real simple and not simple at all!

 

The Zohar says, “Israel and Torah and The Holy One blessed is He are one!” It sounds unfathomably deep and it probably is but there is a practical value in knowing this hard to understand fact.

 

Even Haman was able to identify a certain weakness and vulnerability of the Jewish People. He declared in his appeal to Achashveirosh, “There is a singular nation distributed and spread amongst the nations.” He recognized the lack of unity curiously of a singular nation.

 

There was also a diminished appreciation of the importance of Torah, as evidenced by their rejection of Mordechai’s advice not to go to the grand party of Achashveivosh.

 

To top it off HASHEM’s face was hidden! Ouch! It doesn’t get worse! When the Jewish People are alienated from each other, they are distant from Torah, and they are simultaneously withdrawn from HASHEM. That’s the three fold problem! How is it resolved?

 

A remarkable story circulated around Eretz Yisrael a number of years ago. Even if it is not confirmed as true, it still conveys a deep and relevant message that may help explain why we are made more vulnerable to an enemy attack when our business practices are less than honest.

 

It was during the time of when a young soldier whose last name was Wachsman was captured. His parents took an immediate and active role in rallying the entire nation to pray and light extra candles.

 

There were huge prayer rallies lead by the parents at the Western Wall and there was a profound sense of unity and common purpose that crossed all kinds of ideological lines and stated philosophies of life.

 

The end of the story, however, is less pleasant. The young man, on whose behalf these forces were set in motion, was brutally murdered and the momentary solidarity faded as fast.

Around that same time a young man who had been in a coma awoke shortly afterward and asked to be brought to a certain luminary personality in our generation. He told the elder Rabbi that he had been visited in a dream by an elderly woman and was told to deliver a specific message. The Rabbi displayed a picture of his deceased wife and asked if that was the woman. He confirmed that it was.

 

She had asked him to relay the following: That the unity at the time of the incident of that young soldier’s capture and the events that followed was so profound that Moshiach could have come at that very moment, if it had not been for the sin of theft and ill-gotten gains in the marketplace.

 

At the conclusion of the Megila it states that the Jews “gathered together and stood up for their lives…” The Sefas Emes notes that the word for standing “Amad” is singular- not plural similar to when the Nation of Israel camped by Mt. Sinai with a singular expression. There Rashi says, “Like one man with one heart!” The unity was powerful and real.

 

Afterwards, in the Megila, there was also a re-reception of Torah, and although still hidden HASHEM’s inclusion in every detail of our lives was revealed.

 

All three alienations were dissolved in one swift movement of unified purpose. The cure could easily come from a rededication to Torah learning or taking the time think very deeply about the reality of HASHEM’s involvement in our lives and how our story is History!

 

DvarTorah, Copyright © 2007 by Rabbi Label Lam and Torah.org.

 

King of Hearts

Parshas Tetzaveh

Posted on February 25, 2026 (5786) By Rabbi Naftali Reich | Series: Legacy | Level: Beginner

 

This week’s Torah portion is devoted primarily to describing in intricate detail the special vestments worn by the kohanim and kohen godol when performing their service in the Bais Hamikdash, and the manner in which these garments were to be crafted.

 

Of these, the most magnificent was the choshen, the breastplate worn by the kohain godol. On its surface were attached 12 precious stones with the name of a tribe engraved on each one.

 

Within the choshen lay the urim v’tumim, the slip of parchment upon which Hashem’s name was inscribed. This name gave the choshen its sublime power through which the individual letters of the tribal names would light up (signified by the word “urim” meaning light).

 

When the illuminated letters were properly aligned, they provided the answers to questions of national import posed by the kohen gadol to Hashem. Various letters of the breastplate would become luminescent, allowing the high priest to unite them into words, in order to read Hashem’s response (signified by the word “tumim,” completeness or wholeness).

 

This miraculous Divine form of communication remained with the Jewish people until King Yehoash hid the urim v’tumim at the time of the First Temple’s destruction, to ensure that it would not fall into enemy hands.

 

Our sages point out that Aharon Hakohen merited to wear this wondrous vestment as reward for a particularly noble deed. When Moshe was chosen as the redeemer of the Jewish people, he was worried that his older brother, Aharon, would feel a tinge of jealousy at his being passed over for this exalted role. Hashem testified to him (Shemos 4:15) that, on the contrary, Aharon rejoiced in his heart at his brother’s appointment to greatness.

 

It was due to this noble and selfless joy at his brother’s lofty position, says the Midrash, that Aharon merited to become the bearer of the choshen.

 

We cannot fail to marvel at Aharon who exhibited such amazing selflessness towards his younger brother. But why was he rewarded specifically with being able to wear the choshen?

 

Couldn’t Hashem have alternatively showered him with wealth or longevity as a reward?

 

The manner in which Hashem communicated his message to His people through the choshen provides us with a fascinating clue as to why this particular reward was most appropriate.

 

Whenever Hashem responded to a question from the kohain godol, the answer was conveyed through the choshen’s illuminated letters. But the response had to be deciphered by aligning the glowing letters in a particular sequence, so that the words they formed would correctly determine Hashem’s precise answer. It required a great measure of temimus, pure faith and wholeness of heart, to correctly interpret the Divine communication.

 

On various occasions we read in the Talmud that the message of the choshen was misread and misinterpreted, often with dire consequences. To correctly decipher the code required a rare degree of pure-heartedness and objectivity. By expunging every trace of ego and demonstrating that he was capable of rejoicing in his brother’s good fortune, Aharon attained this degree of selflessness.

 

Aharon’s quintessence reflected his loving embrace of his fellow Jews. Because he saw each Jew as a beloved brother, he excelled in uniting others, in fostering peace and harmony between people. Untainted by envy or self-aggrandizement, he knew how to draw forth the best in others and how to build on these strengths.

 

Aharon perceived no evil in anyone for he truly saw the inner light that ennobled every Jew. He was thus capable of using the illuminated letters of the urim v’tumim, and interpreting them as Hashem desired.

 

In our own lives we, too, can strive to attain a degree of Aharon’s noble trait of being able to rejoice in another’s good fortune and to discern their special virtues. By emphasizing the inherent goodness of our family members, our neighbors and co-workers, we too will merit the skill of interpreting life’s message appropriately and communicating directly with our Divine source.

 

Wishing you a wonderful Shabbos,

Rabbi Naftali Reich Text Copyright © 2013 by Rabbi Naftali Reich and Torah.org.

 

 

A Real Story in the Making

Parshas Terumah

Posted on January 31, 2014 (5774) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah| Level: Beginner

 

“And they shall make Me a Sanctuary that I may dwell among them.” (Shemos 25:8) It’s a big wonder that the Torah spends so much ink on the description of the construction of the Tabernacle which was a one-time event in history that seems to have little relevance or practicality for us today. Yet we recite nightly, “It is our life and the length of our days…”There are many other important details about Shabbos or the construction Tefillin that would be much more valuable, seemingly for us to know about and yet they are relegated to the Oral Torah after an abbreviated phrase. Why does the Torah take almost 4 and ½ Parshios to tell us how the Mishkan was built?

 

The Chofetz Chaim remarked that on a map of the world you’ll find the names of big cities like New York, Paris, Tokyo, etc. shown in large print on the map. In Heaven G-d has His map of the world and there is Jerusalem, Vilna, Radin, etc. in his day and Jerusalem, Brooklyn, Queens, Lakewood, Bnei Brak, and Monsey in our time. These are the special places where The Almighty has His people who are quietly learning, and praying, and carrying out His will ever so discretely within the four cubits of Hallacha.

 

By extension, perhaps we can say that there is a newspaper on earth and we know already what’s in the worldly paper. It’s a constant recycling of the most sensational combination of jealously, appetite, and glory seeking. We don’t have to guess about the heavenly map either.

 

The Torah is a record of that which catches the Almighty’s attention. Whatever is most treasured is most often repeated, like the story of Eliezer the servant of Avraham, loving the convert, and the Exodus from Egypt.

 

Now we get to a practical point. In a parenting class my wife and I received a most useful piece of advice. If ever children are acting up during mealtime, rather than attending immediately to the trouble maker(s), turn attention to the ones acting civilly. “Look how nice Sara is sitting!” “See how Eli is eating so carefully!” etc.

 

Rather than noticing the rebels and thereby inviting others too, ignore them. Encourage the good quiet behavior. Give proper attention to those who are doing what they are supposed to be doing. It works like this in class daily and at assemblies as well. Just point out the how much you appreciate some display of good behavior and suddenly there is a contagion of cooperation that spreads like whipped butter on warm bread. It works! Just try it!

 

By the way, by failing to do this, the news media is complicit in and even responsible for promoting terrorism and other miscreant behavior in the world by giving free advertisement and attention to their ruinous causes.

 

When it comes to the construction of the Tabernacle in the dessert, we have a unique event in human history. There is a group of people, a whole nation in fact, working in cooperation, setting aside egos, personal opinions, and political agendas while using their unique talents and resources to create a place for G-d in this world and all according to Divine specs. That action is newsworthy in Heaven. The Torah focuses enormous attention on the good news!

 

During the time when these Torah events actually occurred there were no doubt presidential scandals, wars, and social upheaval, but that’s not new, and it’s not news. What’s new and what’s really news is not the child shouting at the dining room table and disrupting. It’s natural to rant and rave, setting the whole house into a state of chaos, and it’s not unusual for the parent to obsess only on that.

 

What would be new and news worthy is the wisdom of a parent who fixes his or her gaze of love on the good one with only a few spots on his shirt and the one who is quietly contributing to the harmony of the family orchestra.

 

 

Teachable Moments

Parshas Mishpatim

Posted on February 16, 2012 (5772) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah| Level: Beginner

Do not offend a stranger (verbally) and do not oppress him (financially) because you were strangers in the land of Egypt. (Shemos 22:20)

 

Because you were strangers: If you hurt him with words he can say to you that you also come from strangers. “Do not tease friend about a blemish that you- yourself possess!” A stranger is someone who was not born in that country but rather came from a different country to live there. (Rashi)

 

It sounds a little odd that we should not put down a stranger because the same thing could be said about us! Is that a worthy reason? Don’t do it because it’s offensive! It’s wrong! That’s all!

 

Do we need justification at all? Why then are we reminded that we were strangers in Egypt as a reason not to speak hurtful words to a stranger?

 

It could be that we might even have a stronger subconscious tendency to look down on someone that reminds us of our own weakness or vulnerability. Perhaps that’s what Rashi means but maybe there’s another purpose to those words, “because you were strangers in the land of Egypt.”

 

One of my boys, when he was in grade school, was being picked on daily. We wanted badly to champion his cause but he refused to identify the instigators. The administration and Rebbe were consulted. Attempts were made to squelch it. Nothing changed. The poor kid came home in tears every day. We all know the remedy. Kids who pick on others only do it when they sense that they are getting a reaction. There’s a tendency to want to tell a child (or an adult) “Don’t let them bother you!”

 

Unfortunately, it rarely works. If someone tells you not to think about pink elephants suddenly they are dancing even more in your head. He was in pain and we were frustrated. What were we to do?

 

With help from heaven, I stumbled upon a practical approach. At first I sat with my boy and asked him what they had been saying about him that made him feel so tortured. The words bled out slowly, “dummy-head”, “cookoo”, “stinky” and stuff like that. I wrote down each on a piece of paper and tried to logically dispute the veracity of their claims. I soon realized though that I was talking to the head when it was the heart that hurt. Then I put my money where their mouths were and I gave him three dollars- one for each false utterance. I now had his undivided attention. I asked him to please do me a favor and write down each insulting phrase they say tomorrow and that I would pay him a dollar for every one. I even gave him a special pad of paper and a pen for the occasion.

 

Well, the next day he came home with a long face covered with sadness. I was curious to see the paper. Empty! He reported that nobody teased him today. It worked! Once they realized that not only was he not poised to be hurt by their words and that he was happily awaiting them, their thrill was ended and so they ceased.

 

Now that it was finally over, I didn’t want to lose this precious parental opportunity to crown the episode with a lasting lesson. This was the teachable moment! I felt it necessary to tell my son the following which he accepted with unusual depth and sensitivity, “Now that you know what it feels like to be picked on you should make certain not to do it to anybody else. If there is ever a kid who is different or isolated or is for whatever odd reason a candidate for being picked on you should make it your business to befriend or defend him. With that in mind, son, maybe this whole messy episode will have been worthwhile!”

 

It could be that our struggles and even our most suffering situations, just like being in Egypt, can be converted into super assets. How so? In English there’s a difference between the words, “sympathy” and “empathy”. “Sympathy” is a remote feeling of pity while “empathy” is a feeling of identification with another’s pain. Maybe it’s a strategy to keep from feeling superior to the stranger amongst us to consciously recall our vulnerabilities and realize teachable moments.

 

DvarTorah, Copyright © 2007 by Rabbi Label Lam and Torah.org.

Good Judgment

Parshas Mishpatim

Posted on February 1, 2019 (5779) By Rabbi Yaakov Menken | Series: Lifeline | Level: Beginner

Our reading begins, “And these are the judgments…” [Ex. 21:1]

The laws in the Torah described as “judgments” are civil laws, which every society must have in order to avoid anarchy. Yet the Torah emphasizes that its civil laws are of Divine origin, like the laws governing the Sabbath and festivals. As Rabbi Shlomo Yitzchaki says, “Just as the earlier [words] were from Sinai, these also are from Sinai.”

 

The world cannot tell us what is right, appropriate, and good — even in the area of civil laws.

 

This is true both of the laws themselves, and in how they are observed. Secular civil laws are things we are forced to do… unless we feel certain we won’t get caught. All Torah laws, by contrast, should be ones we are anxious to observe in meticulous detail.

 

The Torah tells us that even in our daily affairs, there is a Divine standard. We shouldn’t learn how to act, how we should conduct ourselves, from watching society around us. We shouldn’t mimic those whom others admire, whether that means politicians, the wealthy, sports “heros” or entertainers (none of whom, it must be said, have distinguished themselves as role models).

 

Who, then, should we emulate? The answer is obvious: the scholars who have absorbed the teachings of the Torah. In the Talmud, Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai says that one who has learned Torah and Talmud, yet has not served a scholar, is still an ignorant person! [Brachos 47b] This is because Torah is about a different approach to life, and not simply an intellectual exercise.

 

Learning how a holy person conducts his daily affairs is a lesson in Torah.

 

It’s not that hard to see the difference. A child raised on “these found items are his [to keep], but these must be announced [in order to return them]” gains a different perspective than one taught “finders keepers, losers weepers!”

 

My wife heard from a teacher who, after decades of experience in public schools, started teaching in the primary school my boys attended. She told of an incident that made her realize she was in a “different” school (her word).

 

She awarded a boy a can of soda as a prize at the end of class. He stopped to put the can in his locker on his way to his next class, to drink it later — and she asked him if he would prefer that she keep the soda for him to pick up from her, so that no one would take it in the meantime.

“No one would take my soda,” said the boy. “That would be stealing!”

 

What is obvious to children is not always equally obvious to adults. Our minds learn to make excuses, and we are influenced by what we read and hear, by what others have done. This is why it is so important to learn from the standards of the Torah, and the practices of scholars. “Even” in daily affairs, we should aim for a higher standard!