Delayed Gratitude

Parshas Yisro

Posted on February 4, 2021 (5781) By Mordechai Dixler | Series: Lifeline | Level: Beginner

 

After the great miracles of the Exodus — the splitting of the sea, the falling of the Manna, and the Jewish victory when attacked by the Amalek nation — Yisro (Jethro), Moshe’s father-in-law, was so impressed by this evidence of G-d’s love for His nation that he traveled into the desert to join them, to become one of them.

 

Upon his arrival, Moshe recounted to Yisro all that had transpired. To this Yisro responded, “Blessed is G-d, who saved you from the hand of Egypt and Pharaoh!” The Talmud comments that no one said “Baruch Hashem” (Blessed is G-d) before Yisro.

 

“Baruch Hashem” is essentially an expression of thanks to G-d. Was Yisro really the first to thank G-d? The Torah recounts numerous instances when the Patriarchs and others gave thanks as well. Moshe and Miriam led the Jewish People (separately) in singing praises to G-d after the sea split and the pursuing Egyptians were drowned. What, then, was unique about Yisro’s expression of thanks?

 

Those who preceded Yisro were thankful, but they only expressed their thanks immediately after they were personally favored with G-d’s goodness. The moment of deliverance overwhelmed them with a sense of gratitude, and they recognized G-d as the source of their blessing. Yisro’s special expression of thanks came long after the splitting of the sea, possibly many months later [and in addition, he was not there himself to witness it]. He was the first to give thanks after the excitement of the moment had abated. He showed we should be no less thankful, and express our thanks even for kindnesses of the past. (Based on a weekly Maamar of HaRav Moshe Sternbach)

 

As any self-help book will tell you, gratitude is an essential ingredient of happiness. The challenge is to be thankful even when life appears to be unkind to us. To keep ourselves in good spirits, it is crucial to maintain a feeling of gratitude for previous kindnesses, even many years after they happened — for that feeling will help us pass through what may seem to be darker times.

 

We must also be thankful for G-d’s daily gifts, which are so common that we may not think about them. The simple ability to breathe is a constant gift. Tragically, the Covid virus, one that can severely infect the lungs and impair breathing, has taught all of us not to take steady breathing for granted. So this, too, is a constant reason to give thanks.

 

In reality, we should constantly be giving thanks for the gifts given to us at every moment, but routine would quickly drain this of all meaning. We owe it to G-d and to ourselves, nonetheless, to express our thanks for the commonplace at least periodically, and to recall the gifts of the past as well.

 

Judaism incorporates gratitude into our daily prayers: “Modim,” in particular, is both an essential part of the Amida, the standing prayer, and a beautiful expression of thanks (in translation, its text may be found here). It is important both religiously and psychologically that we teach ourselves not to merely recite, but to deeply feel its words.

 

And we owe our thanks to Yisro for teaching mankind this meaningful lesson!

 

The post Delayed Gratitude appeared first on Project Genesis, Leaders in Online Jewish Learning.

 

Yisro’s Active Ingredient

Parshas Yisro

Posted on January 19, 2022 (5782) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

 

A literal reading of the Parsha tells us that Yitro, who was the high priest of Midian and the father-in-law of Moshe, saw of the events of the Exodus from Egypt and, according to Rashi based on Midrash, saw the battle the Jewish people fought against Amalek.

 

The Torah implies, and Rashi states openly, that upon hearing of these events, Yitro was propelled to leave his home, and to come into the desert to accompany the Jewish people, at least initially, on their travels through the Sinai desert. The Torah does not tell us how he heard about these events, but, apparently, they were of such earth-shattering proportions, that the news spread rapidly throughout the Middle East.

 

From the verses in the song of Moshe and the Jewish people, at the splitting of the waters of Yam Suf, it is obvious that Yitro was not alone in hearing about these wonderous events. The verse says that all the nations of the area were also astounded to hear of these miracles, and to realize that a new nation had been born from the slavery of Egypt. Yet, the reaction of the people in those countries and especially that of Amalek certainly differed greatly from the response of Yitro to the very same news.

 

The nations of the world chose either to oppose the news by attacking the Jewish people, or, mostly, to simply ignore it as not being worthy of their concern. People are so confirmed in their inertia that even when there is an event that obviously is historic and earth-shattering, but which would, at the same time, cause a reassessment of their own lives, attitudes, and policies, they will, in the main, either deny the news, besmirch the miracle, or ignore the matter completely.

 

It is to the credit of Yitro that he chose to act positively upon hearing of the events that occurred to the Jewish people in their exodus from Egypt. Of course, being the father-in-law of Moshe, he also had a personal vested interest in visiting his family, but, nevertheless, it must be recorded to his credit, that he uprooted himself to join the Jewish people in their travels through the desert.

 

One of the great tests in life is how one responds to news that is momentous and unexpected, that makes it necessary to change one’s habits and life direction. Jews often piously – and I do not doubt their sincerity when they say it – put off momentous decisions until the Messiah arrives. But the little I know of human nature teaches me that even when the Messiah arrives, there will be many who will not be willing to change their life pattern, sell everything to join the Jewish people in the land of Israel, with all the accompanying hardships that inevitably will be involved. People hear many things, many times very important things, but this knowledge does not necessarily imply that they are willing to act upon them in a positive and productive manner. Yitro is eternally privileged to have a portion of the Torah on his name because he heard and shortly thereafter, he acted.

 

Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Berel Wein

 Complain All You Want

Parshas Yisro

Posted on February 5, 2021 (5781) By Rabbi Label Lam | Series: Dvar Torah | Level: Beginner

 

You shall neither prostrate yourself before them nor worship them, for I, HASHEM, your G-d, am a zealous G-d, Who visits the iniquity of the fathers upon the sons, upon the third and the fourth generation of those who hate Me, and [I] perform loving kindness to thousands [of generations], to those who love Me and to those who keep My commandments. (Shemos 20:5-6)

 

Of those who hate Me: As the Targum [Onkelos paraphrases: when the sons continue to sin following their fathers, i.e.], when they cling to their fathers’ deeds. — Rashi

Perform loving-kindness: that a person does, to pay the reward until the two-thousandth generation. It is thus found that the measure of reward [from G-d] exceeds the measure of [His] retribution by [the ratio of] one to five hundred, for this one is for four generations, and that one is for two thousand [generations] – Rashi
–
Rashi explains that we are being treated to an important mathematical ratio right in the introductory words of the Ten Commandments, HASHEM is visiting iniquity for 3 or 4 generations and rewarding 2000 generations. It seems there is not 2000 generations to speak of. History is not that long. The giving of the Torah was only 26 generation from Adam the first man and we are now 3333 years since that awesome day. Even if a generation is 30 years, then there have been slightly more than 100 till now. Rashi helps by spelling out the ratio of HASHEM’s kindliness to strictness being 500 to 1. What are we to do with this formula? Of what practical import is it to us? Dare I ask?! Here are a few approaches.

 

A few years back I was driving daily to school in Queens from Monsey and back again to Monsey after a long day. One wintry evening I was approaching the toll at the Whitestone Bridge as I had done many times before. We had just passed through a strong winter storm and were still in the middle of a severe cold spell. As I was nearing the toll plaza I watched in horror as if it was unfolding in slow motion before my eyes.

 

On the top of a van traveling in front of me was a huge slab of ice like a giant tomb stone and hard like one too. It came flying off of the roof of the van and it was spinning horizontally in the air. Suddenly with great force it hit my windshield, across the entire windshield with full force.

If I was going 50 MPH and this projectile was flying at my car 30 miles an hour then this was a huge 80 MPH hit. I was temporarily blinded, unable to see out of my front window for 7 or 8 seconds and when the ice dispersed my windshield was a spiderweb of broken glass. I called a mechanic friend who assured me that the glass would not shatter into the car at me because it was made of two layers. That comforted for the ride home. I was still pretty shaken up.

 

The next morning I came to school with my wife’s car and I entered a class where the Rebbe was teaching about the Ten Commandments and he was up to this Rashi that explains the 500 to 1 ratio. He was explaining to them that HASHEM is always 500 times more benevolent. Then something occurred to me and I started to make a calculation: How long I had been working there, how many times I had made that trip back and forth.

 

I asked to speak to the class and I shared with them my harrowing experience heading home the night before. I was thinking and wondering why this terrible episode had happened to me and then it dawned on me that I had made that trip about 500 times with no incident and this may have been my 501st trip that I had taken. Now I felt that rather than complain and groan about what had happened and almost happened to me I needed to celebrate the 500 times nothing happened. THANK YOU HASHEM!

 

I was speaking with someone who had a lot to grumble about and after listening and validating his pain I told him the following based on the Rashi that explains this holy ratio; “Complain as much as you want and deservedly so but first you have to express gratitude about 500 things and then launch one complaint. Find another 500 things to celebrate and complain all you want!

 

Yisro’s Active Ingredient

Parshas Yisro

Posted on January 19, 2022 (5782) By Rabbi Berel Wein | Series: Rabbi Wein | Level: Beginner

 

A literal reading of the Parsha tells us that Yitro, who was the high priest of Midian and the father-in-law of Moshe, saw of the events of the Exodus from Egypt and, according to Rashi based on Midrash, saw the battle the Jewish people fought against Amalek.

 

The Torah implies, and Rashi states openly, that upon hearing of these events, Yitro was propelled to leave his home, and to come into the desert to accompany the Jewish people, at least initially, on their travels through the Sinai desert. The Torah does not tell us how he heard about these events, but, apparently, they were of such earth-shattering proportions, that the news spread rapidly throughout the Middle East.

 

From the verses in the song of Moshe and the Jewish people, at the splitting of the waters of Yam Suf, it is obvious that Yitro was not alone in hearing about these wonderous events. The verse says that all the nations of the area were also astounded to hear of these miracles, and to realize that a new nation had been born from the slavery of Egypt. Yet, the reaction of the people in those countries and especially that of Amalek certainly differed greatly from the response of Yitro to the very same news.

 

The nations of the world chose either to oppose the news by attacking the Jewish people, or, mostly, to simply ignore it as not being worthy of their concern. People are so confirmed in their inertia that even when there is an event that obviously is historic and earth-shattering, but which would, at the same time, cause a reassessment of their own lives, attitudes, and policies, they will, in the main, either deny the news, besmirch the miracle, or ignore the matter completely.

 

It is to the credit of Yitro that he chose to act positively upon hearing of the events that occurred to the Jewish people in their exodus from Egypt. Of course, being the father-in-law of Moshe, he also had a personal vested interest in visiting his family, but, nevertheless, it must be recorded to his credit, that he uprooted himself to join the Jewish people in their travels through the desert.

 

One of the great tests in life is how one responds to news that is momentous and unexpected, that makes it necessary to change one’s habits and life direction. Jews often piously – and I do not doubt their sincerity when they say it – put off momentous decisions until the Messiah arrives. But the little I know of human nature teaches me that even when the Messiah arrives, there will be many who will not be willing to change their life pattern, sell everything to join the Jewish people in the land of Israel, with all the accompanying hardships that inevitably will be involved. People hear many things, many times very important things, but this knowledge does not necessarily imply that they are willing to act upon them in a positive and productive manner. Yitro is eternally privileged to have a portion of the Torah on his name because he heard and shortly thereafter, he acted.

 

Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Berel Wein