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Soundness of Silence
Posted on March
27, 2003 (5763)
By Rabbi Label
Lam | Series: Dvar Torah | Level: Beginner The
sons of Aaron, Nadab and Abihu…. brought before Hashem an alien fire that He
had not commanded them. A fire
came forth from Hashem and consumed
them, and they
died before Hashem. Moses said to Aaron; Of this did Hashem speak
saying: “I will be sanctified through those
who are nearest to Me, thus I will be honored before the entire people.”
And Aaron was
silent. (Vayikra 10:1-3)
This is what
Moses said to Aaron: “Aaron
my brother, your
sons only died
to sanctify the name of The Holy
One Blessed Be He.” Since
Aaron knew his sons were
amongst those who know The Omnipresent he was silent
and he received a reward. (Talmud
Zevachim )
How was Aaron able
to remain still
and why? It couldn’t be that he was uniquely stoic and
unemotional. Aaron is characterized as the one who loved
and pursued peace
who loved people
and brought them
close. He had extraordinary feelings.
A friend of mine asked
me as a favor to remind people
when I get a chance
of an important detail in Jewish Law. I’ll take that opportunity and do it now. When he was sitting Shiva for his father well
meaning people crowded
into his parents’ house to offer
condolences. He felt like sitting quietly at times but
too many had
the competing need
to initiate conversation.
The Law requires that the visitors
take a cue from the
mourner. If he is silent
they should remain silent. If he talks they may join in. That is the sensitivity of the Hallacha- Jewish Law.
How do we know, then,
that it was appropriate for Moses to address Aaron
at that time? The Malbim explains that
that the verb
“Vayidom” -He was silent- is different from
other expressions of quietude. This term means
that that he interrupted his speaking and became
quieted. He stopped from speaking. It is implied
that Moses had interjected his
point and Aaron said no more.
The Malbim posits
what the content
of that missing
monologue was. Aaron,
was no doubt
in the act of accepting that his past
misdeeds and his children’s failures had finally come
to haunt them. Moses
then comforted and quieted him by telling
him that they
died because of their
greatness and closeness to Hashem.
When Aaron understood this message he was quiet.
The Malbim points
out that this
trait can be witnessed in many great
people and explains how they are able to live with
the pain of personal tragedy:
1)
These great people live with an awareness of how puny,
vulnerable, and limited
our perspective is in comparison to The Almighty. “Be not rash
with your mouth,
and let your heart not be hasty
to utter a word before
G-d; for G-d is heaven
and you are
on earth. So let
your words be few. (Koheles
5:1)
2)
They are ever cognizant of the kindliness that is constantly visited upon them by The Creator. They feel overwhelmed with gratitude. Even a great
withdrawal does not deplete
the bank account of trust they have in G-d. The opposite is true. It is we who are deep in overdraft.
3)
They appreciate how the force of their
own deficiencies and active faults
contribute to their hapless state.
They accept it as a lesson and hope to improve.
Let it be understood and
acknowledged that this
is all addressed to head
and not the
heart. When the
heart is hurting
it is neigh impossible to speak to the head.
One of my great
teachers once offered the following helpful
distinction that might
lend some assistance to even the still
swollen heart. There
is a difference to be made between
“an answer” and “an
approach”.
If someone asks,
“Why did this tragic event
happen to him and now?”
There may not be
an immediate answer. “An answer”
eliminates and cancels
out the need
for a question. “An
approach” does not presume to explain the
specific reason “why”.
There may be thousands
of possibilities and we admittedly don’t know which.
We can be comforted by “an approach” because it allows
us to live with a question.
Aaron was busy
speaking out “an approach” when his brother
Moses offered him
the ultimate consolation, “an answer”. With the certainty
of prophetic insight
that this double death was charged
with meaning Aaron
was quieted and from that
perspective we can
all appreciate the soundness of silence.
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