Improving Our Character
Parshas
Eikev
One of the greatest
challenges we face in life is being trapped in the rut of our personal
shortcomings. As time progresses, we become more alert to those flaws that
despite our efforts, have resisted change. It may be a propensity to anger or a
lack of organizational skills. It may be a tendency to be self-centered or
jealous of others. These mindsets tend to lock us in a viselike grip; as much
as we try we simply cannot escape.
One of the underlying
principles of both the mussar and the Chassidic schools of thought is that we
must never despair of improving our character, even regarding traits that are
so stubborn they seem to be genetically embedded.
The saintly Yesod
Hoavoda once told his disciples that he asked a professional horse jockey if
his horse ever threw him to the ground. “Of course,” said the jockey.
“Everyone, even the most professional rider, gets thrown from time to time.”
“What do you do when
you get thrown?” asked the Yesod Hoavodah. “I hold on to the reins and jump
back on to the saddle as fast as I can. If not, the horse will run away and I
will be left with nothing,” the horse jockey replied.
“Our body too, pulls in different directions. While we try to
harness its instincts, they are often times more powerful than we are, but that
does not mean that we must despair of ever changing. Admitting defeat should be
unthinkable-since striving for self-improvement and self-elevation is what our
task in this world is all about.
King Solomon says in
Koheles, “Sheva yipol tzadik vekam,” seven times the righteous fall, but they
will stand. Simply put, a righteous person will fall seven times but will continuously
struggle back to his feet and get back in the running.
There is a classical homiletical interpretation of this verse
that provides an avenue to assist us in getting back on our feet after a fall.
A great Chassidic sage said we may fall seven times but if we know that deep
down, our most fundamental desire is to be virtuous, to cleanse ourselves of
unsavory instincts and elevate ourselves to be moral, giving and unselfish, we
will persevere.
Just as a child when
severely criticized will tend to internalize the judgment and feel he or she is
incurably bad, we adults may also become harshly self-critical and “throw in
the towel” on trying to improve. Instead of giving more power to our nature’s
darker side, however, our job is to reinforce the belief that a human being can
reach for-and attain-the stars. We must stand erect and jump back in to the
lifelong challenge of self-improvement, relying on assistance from Above to
help us in the struggle.
This theme is echoed
n a verse in this week’s Parsha. The Torah tells us, Vehaya, im lo sishmiun
bekoli,” and it will come to pass, if you do not obey my voice and you stray
after idols, I warn you today that you will be utterly destroyed and decimated,
if you do not heed my voice. The word “vehaya” always precedes joyous tidings,
the Sages say. Why then in so tragic a situation as the Jewish people straying
from hearkening to G-d’s word should the Torah use the word “vehaya?”
Furthermore, the
commentaries ask, why does this piece conclude with the verse that all these
terrible punishments will befall you since “you do not listen to Hashem’s
voice” (present tense)? Would it not be more apropos to write “since you have
not listened to Hashem’s voice” (past tense)?
The saintly Bnei Yisaschar explains that the Torah is alluding
to the very concept we have discussed above. Sometimes we stray very far from
where are supposed to be. A little voice inside of us tells us that we are doomed,
and we might as well come to terms with our personal failure and embrace our
diminished and compromised status. We will never be able to regain our footing
and climb back up to spiritual heights.
It is that self-critical voice that is constantly buzzing
inside of us, declaring we are doomed. Yet “vehaya,” -the joyous tidings associated
with this word teaches that the way to arouse Hashem’s joy, so to speak, even
as our inner voice condemns us, is to resist that voice with all our energy,
and to choose self-affirmation instead. Bolstered by faith in Hashem’s helping
power, we can boost our self-confidence and courage in tackling life’s
ever-present challenges, and thereby succeed in realizing our inner spiritual
aspirations.
Wishing you a
wonderful Shabbos.
Rabbi Naftali Reich
Text Copyright © 2013
by Rabbi Naftali Reich and Torah.org.
Rabbi Reich is on the
faculty of the Ohr Somayach Tanenbaum Education
Center.
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